The following is a kind of condensation of the inner vision that I feel such a deep desire to share, a vision that goes right back to the heart of the Gospel and the immense joy that it gives; a vision that roots us anew in the peace, rest, and playfulness of childhood which we have lost but which we thirst to regain; finally, a vision, an experience, an embrace, which allows us to remain close to Christ throughout our life, abiding at his side, intimately united to him in everything, until the definitive union that awaits us in eternity.

Inner Spirit: Mary and the Beloved Disciple

It has been impressed upon me very strongly in the last months how deeply the spirit and charism that God has entrusted to me deeply resonates with the longings and desires of many people. This is, of course, not because of anything special in me, who remain only his little child. Rather, I believe, it is simply because this gift addresses a central need of human existence–indeed the very central reality–which is in danger of being neglected or forgotten in contemporary society (even sometimes by those within the Church). This is the truth that God has created each one of us, not for the sake of some external task, but ultimately for the joy of abiding intimacy, for the most unspeakably profound communion with him and with our brothers and sisters.

This is the deepest and most intimate longing of the human heart and also the ardent desire of God for every one of his beloved children. Yet this can so often be obscured by the burdensome sense of responsibility and obligation that we bear as a yoke on our shoulders, by a false emphasis on “mission” or an unhealthy “altruism” in serving others, which is fractured from the truth of our own belovedness before our Father. Here the sense of “adult” responsibility eclipses the childlike playfulness which was meant to cradle our entire life within itself, allowing it to unfold at every moment in true freedom and relaxation of heart.

But what is mission if not sharing spontaneously the joy of intimacy that we have received? What is love of others but our welcoming them into our hearts from within the truth of our own identity as God’s beloved child…such that two little children of the same Father meet in the enveloping mystery of his grace and love? Indeed, what is love except gazing upon our brothers and sisters with the same loving gaze that we have first received from our Father–and which has touched, embraced, healed, and liberated our own hearts? Yes, to love is not first to give, to “generously” serve others; rather, it is first of all simply the openness of heart to receive the gift of the beloved, the gift of who the beloved is…both God and one’s brothers and sisters. If there is not, at the heart of our every encounter, a pure contemplative receptivity–radiant with wonder, awe, gratitude, and playfulness–then there cannot be a full blossoming of authentic love…this precious flower and fruit of the interpersonal intimacy for which every human heart longs.

In all of my writing and my classes, of course, this profound experience at the heart of my life finds expression. This conviction that I burn to share with others, the thirst for which I see etched in every person’s face and shining in every person’s eyes…this is something that I feel I can never express enough, never manifest enough in my words, my actions, my prayer, my life. How can the gap between one and the other be overcome–between the ardent thirst of God and the thirst of every human heart which yearns so deeply for him?

I will continue to speak and write about this in whatever ways that I can. One thing that I will begin to share a little bit more about is the unique nature, the unique “contours” of my own charism, which manifests my spiritual experience of God’s invitation to receive this gift, dwell in it, and share it with others. There are certain things that it is perhaps not yet proper to share openly, not in fullness, since I do not want to anticipate the judgment of the Church, allowing things to unfold in God’s way and God’s time. But the central vision…this I desire to share, since I believe that it is universal, touching on the true heartbeat of the Church, and indeed of the Trinity himself, who draws so close to us yearning to press us to his heart.

In the section of this website entitled “Spirit and Charism,” I will be sharing things from my own writings on the mystery that I seek to welcome, to live, and to serve with my whole life–words from the “Spirit” and the “Rule of Life” that I have written for myself and for whomever God may call to share this gift with me for the good of God’s holy Church.

+ + +  I begin by posting an introductory summary, which marks the beginning of the document I have written expressing these things:

The Central and All-Enveloping Mystery: Communion